beyond the green: collective of middlebury voices

a student-run publication that seeks to provide space for voices that are not being heard on our campus. we are grounded by politics that are radical, anti-racist, anti-sexist, anti-classist, anti-homophobic, anti-ableist, and anti-transphobic (against all forms of oppression) and that reject the structural neo-liberal paradigm that characterizes middlebury college and its official publications

Mud: A Poem

By V

Cw: sexual violence, suffocation, curse words

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Me
My sister
My friend
Her sister
My other friend
My other friend’s friend

1 person is already 1 too fucking many
So why do I know so many
How do I know so many survivors
But you don’t know any perpetrators?
How do I hold their bodies and my own
Tears, hair, anger, despair
Shaking like leaves
Shrieking like the wind

How do I hold these bodies
Up to you
As proof
As honesty
As truth
How do I hold these bodies
As resistance
As faith
As vulnerability
To have you deny that they are there
To have you deny them
Compassion
Sincerity
Empathy
Because “my friend would never do that”

Fuck you
Fuck your “but they’re so nice”
Fuck your “chill, it’s just a joke”
Fuck your “people already know about sexual violence and are doing their best to prevent it”

Apparently people do not know
and are not doing shit
Or they do know
And are not doing enough
Shit is being done
When I hear about three separate cases of sexual violence in one weekend
Shit is being done
When survivors are still the only ones supporting each other
Still the only ones holding the community accountable
Still the only ones who may even believe in transformative justice
Still the only ones who can pick themselves up off the ground

I am fed up
I want change
I want people to stop hurting others
I want people to stop allowing their friends to hurt others
I want to stop living in a house
Built for and by the master

It is crushing me
It is being built over me
I can’t breathe
People eat
Chairs scrape
Wine bubbles
Glasses clink
Laughter
Chatter
Above my head
As my body lays buried below
My screams are muffled
They are too disconcerting
I must be quiet
I am disrupting dinner time
The master should eat right?
Eating is a necessity to live
I will just lay here
In the mud
And wait
I will hold my breath
Until the masters are done
I will wait for the right time
I will eat this mud, quietly

 

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This entry was posted on March 16, 2019 by in Uncategorized.
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